First of all, yes… I know this title is very cheesy but I couldn’t help myself. Secondly, welcome to my first blog post! I have to admit, I am bit nervous because I haven’t done this before, but I really want to share how ACTualize came to be, and why it means so much to me.
My name is Szofi, and I’m originally from Hungary, but I’ve been living in the Netherlands for over eight years now. My relationship with psychology started when I was 16. I had this British psychology teacher, Dr. Brian, who made everything, even classical conditioning, feel practical and alive. I knew then that I was drawn to understanding people and this might be the thing for me. But like many of us, I didn’t follow the obvious path, at all…
I first studied European Studies for a year but quickly realized that I miss psychology so I started my bachelor in Psychology. After graduating, I briefly tried a master’s in Epidemiology (you’d think, I would learn from my mistakes) but ended up stopping after a couple of months. After leaving yet another program and burning out in a corporate job, I found myself in a place that felt heavy and lonely.
Eventually, I came back to psychology one last time and this time with more intention and awareness. I applied for a Master’s in Health and Medical Psychology and, while waiting for admission, I started researching everything I could about anxiety and the ways our bodies respond to stress. That’s when I discovered Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT).
At first, ACT didn’t feel natural to me. The idea of making space for uncomfortable thoughts and sensations felt… impossible. But the more I practiced it, the more it started to shift how I related to my own mind and body. I understood that getting rid of uncomfortable things is not the answer, it’s me changing my relationship with these thoughts that is.
Around that same time, I also started to feel physically off. Suddenly I had to go gluten-, dairy-, and mostly sugar-free and as someone who proudly identified as a real pasta girlie, this was really tough.
There’s so much out there: diets for weight loss, personal trainers, online programs, fitness trackers. They might be great short-term tools but they do not seem to stuck for the long-term. When I tried some of these things, I always felt like I was either failing, or that the system I was trying to follow didn’t actually see me or understood me. Not so surprisingly, I came across others feeling the exact same way. Sad, demotivated and confused. That’s when I found a book about using ACT for lifestyle change and something finally clicked.
It made me realize how little space there is in mainstream wellness for the psychological side of health. We’re flooded with rigid programs, 12-week body transformations, motivational slogans, amazing transformations that could be us and discipline and motivation-first coaching. And sure, for some people, that works. But for many, especially those navigating stress, family, mental health struggles, or just real-life responsibilities, it really doesn’t.
The problem isn’t just the plans. It’s the assumption that everyone should approach change the same way. And another layer below that is that there are hundreds of different ways, so which one-size-fits-all method is the right one to choose? It almost seems like everyone can wake up at 6am to train, or follow strict routines, or eat chicken and broccoli for weeks on end except for you right? Well isn’t that an exhausting place to be in. Life doesn’t work like this and most people aren’t failing, you aren’t failing, and I wasn’t failing. We’re just being asked to live like someone we are simply not.
This is where ACTualize comes in.
I wanted to create something truly different. A space that doesn’t push perfection, but helps people reconnect with what actually matters to them. A space that understands that values, not pressure or lousy goals, are what sustain real change. And that it’s okay to fall off track, it really is. What matters is how to come back to what truly matters, what brings joy even when times are messy or hard.
ACTualize is about helping people make committed steps toward a life that feels like their own. Whether that means moving more, eating differently, resting better, or simply learning to relate to themselves with more kindness it’s all valid.
So, that’s how ACTualize came to be. From burnout, detours, and way too many podcasts and talking to people to this place. A place that finally feels like mine. And if you’re reading this, I am truly honored and very happy that you are here. My wish is to give people the perspective, the tools and the courage so that they dare to live richer and more meaningful lives in all of it’s complexity, hurdles and beauty.